A Letter to My Sister...Heidi M. Allen

Dear Heidi,

I miss you! Each day as I write this blog I think of you and remember days of the past and dream of the future. The hours spent scouring Mom’s pictures bring joy, sadness, and memories all at the same time, did you know so many emotions could run parallel?

This week I visited Auntie M and Unc to borrow Aunt Nancy and Gram’s photo albums. I didn’t bring all the bins or albums with me this time yet there are still a lot here. Ed, Mary and I have been looking through them each night to mark the photographs we would like to copy. Some of the pictures of you…take my breath away, while others…break my heart.

You lived a life of joy with a forever smile on your face. Ed teases me often, “The first thing Heidi will do if she is alive and found is yell at you for putting her pictures on the Internet.” This brings eruptions of laughter each time because my response is similar each time, “This would be a welcomed rebuke. She would have to yell as I hugged her.” What if one of these pictures triggers compassion, love, and gumption in the heart of the person or persons responsible for Heidi’s kidnapping? We never know.

Each album cover opened and each page turned opens the door to share “Aunt Heidi” with your precious and lovely niece. You would absolutely adore her. She is strong, independent, creative, and a spitfire! Go figure, the Lord blessed me with a spitfire for a daughter. LOL (new lingo to mean “Laugh Out Loud”)

The conversations, stories, and memories relived because of one picture…priceless gifts. I am so thankful our family is such “picture nuts” because it is the same photo ops we joked about as children that bring such healing and opportunities to share you with Mags.

Sunday is Mother’s Day. This must be a bittersweet day for Mom and the thousands of other Mom’s who have lost a child. On one hand, they can remember the day the Lord blessed them with their son or daughter yet to recall the day and moment they lost their precious gift from God…pain.

How do I truly celebrate Mom this year Heidi? Each year I try to give her a gift that represents us both. She will never forget you. Some days are easier than others but it seems on a day celebrating her life, as a Mom must be one of the most difficult days of the year.

Our parents are still married to each other and ALWAYS put us first ~ the best gift we can give our children, ay? I don’t know what I will give her on Sunday to show “our” love for her yet I do know this…Mom loves us 110%, forever. And we loved her in return. We are fortunate kids.

In closing, I wanted to let you know how much you are loved and missed. There is not a day that goes by you are not remembered by so many others and us. At next week’s Ride for Missing Children in the Mohawk Valley, over 450 riders will remember you. You are never forgotten!

Love ya Sis!
xoxo

Lisa

**A chapter in Steena Holmes’ new book, Finding Emma inspired today’s blog. I will post a review of this book in June as part of Steena’s blog tour.**