On August 21, 1993, my father walked me down the aisle to the shaking, cold, and clammy hand attached to my husband’s arm. My sister stood by my side as my maid-of-honor with jokes, tears, and encouragement every step of the way. Most of the photographs from last year’s remembrance blog series came from a pink album gifted to me by Heidi as a shower gift. Pages and pages of silly, serious, ridiculous, and plain funny shots captured of Heidi and I together from birth through only weeks before I became Mrs. Edward T. Buske.
This year my Mom, Mags, and I scoured the collection of photographs at my parent’s house for something new. We want you to “know” Heidi because she is so much more than a face on a poster…she is my beloved sister.
As the above photo displaced out of the stack and onto the floor I smiled when it landed on the floor. I remember how excited Heidi was to be the flower girl for Kathy’s wedding.
HOWEVER, the smile soon faded and a tear formed in my eye. Heidi walked down the aisle as a flower girl, then as a bride’s maid yet she will never be the bride. She was young, full of life, and in love, yet our Dad wasn’t able to walk her down the aisle. She never heard “Ladies and gentleman for the first time in history I would like to introduce you to Mr. and Mrs. …” no father-daughter dance, and no honeymoon.
There are times I could look at these photos of Heidi as flower girl, Heidi and I with Auntie M, or Heidi and I at my wedding and cry for the joy she was deprived. Yet when I see the longing and pure happiness on her face when she looked at her boyfriend, I am thankful. She may never walk arm in arm with her Daddy to the front alter to have her veil lifted and given to her future groom but she experienced love. She loved another and received this same loved in return.
Most of Heidi’s friends have married, started families and grown to see their dreams come to fruition. I’m thankful they include me in their celebrations and sorrows. I’m thankful some blessed me with the opportunity to watch them walk down the aisle. Heidi’s wedding day never came to be yet true love did. For this, I am thankful.
If you have lost a loved one ~ what is one thing you wish they could have experienced, done, saw, or heard before they passed away?
Lisa M Buske
P.O. Box 323